Messy Writing

A grade 10 girl was just about out the door, but I was still writing in her notebook.  I don't have very neat handwriting unless I'm really trying, so writing quickly, while standing up... It's very messy.  I had memories of trying to decipher one of my violin teacher's handwriting.  He's Greek.

Me: Wait... Just a moment...
Girl [peering at the page]: Okay.
Me: Because... Part of ... learning violin... Involves learning to decipher... Really messy writing...
Girl [with raised eyebrow, then with a 'well, duh' tone of voice]: Uh - my mother is a doctor.
Me [laughing]: Good point.  You'll be fine.

Conductors

A little one, 7 or 8 years old, had been learning for a couple of years.  So she was one of the youngest in the school ensemble.  Plus, very bright (if a little shy).

Girl [a bit excited and nervous]: Um... At school this week... In ensemble... I got to conduct.
Me: Did you?!  Wow!  How exciting!
Girl [grinning]: Yes.
Me: Were you scared at all?
Girl [matter-of-factly]: No.  Not really.  No-one watches the conductor.  I was pretty sure they wouldn't watch me either.

So true.

Look the Part

On Wednesdays, I wear my glasses so I can read the board when helping with grade 3.  I don't teach many kids on Wednesdays, so not many non-grade-3 kids see me with the glasses on.  This 11-yr-old girl obviously hadn't seen them before.

Girl: You...'ve got glasses.
Me: Yep.
Girl: Everyone is getting glasses.
Me: Are you getting them?
Girl: No.  My eyesight is really great.  Unlike my mum's, and my dad's...
Me: Well, I was the last person in my family to get them.
Girl [shocked]: What?!?! Really?  Oh...  Anyway, you look like a real teacher now. [She gasped.  I smiled.  She tried to backpedal].  Oh no!  I mean... I mean... You know...
Me: I know what you mean.  It's just the way it came out.
Girl: It's just... You look like, oh, you know, like, um... [she then gave a demonstration of a teacher in front of a slightly rowdy class].
Me [smiling]: Ah... Yes... 
Girl: More serious.  That's it.
Me: You think?  I'm feeling like I look like a crazy lady today.
Girl: Are you kidding?!  You look even more like a teacher in that outfit, all professional in the jacket, and the blue, and the white, and the... blue... and the ... grey... [looks up and grins]
Me: Well, thank you.

And every time I wrote something, she'd say "You look all serious again!" like this was a new trick I'd learned.  I hope she'll still take me seriously when I'm not wearing the glasses.

Making It Jazzy

9-yr-old boy, just started learning The Entertainer.  Apparently, this is a scary piece.  I decided to work on small chunks instead of tackling the whole piece, and we did the end of the first section first (do re mi do re mi-- do re do mi do re mi-- do re do mi do re mi-- ti,re-- do----).  His first play of it was accurate, but deadly boring.

Me: So, that was fine... But I think we might be able to make it a bit more interesting, don't you?
Boy: Ummm... I guess...
Me: Well, this piece is from the jazz era, so how could we make it sound more like jazz?
Boy: Like, um, like, oh, what's the word... shta-catt-o?
Me: Staccato?
Boy: Yes!
Me: I thought you might say that.  How about this? [I play it, with very short notes.  His face remained passive].  Was it jazzy?  Your face doesn't look convinced.  [Boy grins].  How about, if we made every do with a bit of accent?
Boy: Yeah... [I played - it's not that easy.  His face remained passive, again].
Me: You still don't look convinced.  How about... If we made every mi with an accent?
[Boy looks unconvinced, gives me that "I have a crazy teacher" look].
Me: Let's give it a go, anyway.  [I played, so it sounded more like this: do re MI do re MI-- do re do MI do re MI-- do re do MI do re MI-- ti,re-- do----.  By the 3rd MI, his face had lit up].  That's  more like it - now you look convinced!
Boy [grinning and enthusiastic]: Yeah!  That's the way I want to do it!

And he played it exactly the same way.  But with more of a smile on his face.

Watching Too Much

Last year, I conducted the young string group.  Everyone knows that nobody watches the conductor - but I was trying very hard to get them to watch.  As it turned out, not entirely futilely.  On a day when they'd all been given sugar just before the rehearsal (thanks, whoever was responsible for that one), one of the girls then crashed into her stand.  It was like she just fell off the front of her chair, into the music stand, which then fell over taking the folder and all its music with it, followed by kids from random places around the room getting up with their instruments trying to help, causing more mayhem. 

Me [to stand-crashing girl]: Are you okay?
Girl [a little embarrassed]: Yes...
Me: Are you sure?
Girl: Um, yep...  I ... Can I get some-
Girl 2: Ooh, ooh, I'll get her some ice!
Girl 3: Can I get her some ice too?  I'll help! 
Girl 4: I know where it is!
Me: Everyone sit down.  [instructions for calm collection of ice pack from the adjacent staff room followed.  Girl 1 was still looking a bit shaken and sheepish]  Are you sure you're okay?
Girl: Um, yes... I was- I was just- I was watching you.  Like, like this [proceeds to do an intense stare that pulls her head forward, and her whole body starts coming forward as well...]
Me: Stop!  I get the picture.  No need to do this all over again.
Girl: Oh yeah. 

Dealing With Ballet

It took me many years to realise that many students thought they were relaxed when they were anything but.  And then I realised that most of these girls (yes, girls) were also ballet girls.  There is no relaxation for these girls.  Today, I had a very enthusiastic 11-yr-old dancer trying to convince me she was as relaxed as she could be.

Girl: That is relaxed.
Me: ...Ummm... I can't move your hand at all.  That's not relaxed.
Girl: It's - it's because of ballet!  It's just - ugh.  I can't do relaxed.
Me [with a lightbulb moment]: Oh... Of course.  Can you just... pretend... that ballet doesn't exist...?  Or just ... forget everything you've learned there...?
Girl: Um, not really.  No.  [brightening] Unless you want to talk to my ballet teacher?
Me: Ah, okay. 
Girl [thoughtful]: Ooh.  But - you'd have to wear a business suit.
Me: Okay.
Girl: And high heels.
Me: Ye-
Girl: And more make up.  AND talk in a posh voice.
Me [starting to laugh]: Um, okay.  [posh voice] I think I can manage that.
Girl [enthusiastically]: That was great!  Okay, that should work.

Of course, she didn't tell me the dance teacher's name.  But from how much I know from this girl's life, I should be able track down this teacher. 

Concert Absence

I'd been working towards a concert performance with a 15-yr-old girl.  For about a month, our focus had been the upcoming performance.  Then, with no explanation, she just didn't show.  In the lesson after, I asked her about it.

Me: What happened to you last week?  With the concert?
Girl: I'm so sorry!  I just ... forgot!  I walked home, and then... went... oh yeah...

Music Critic

16-yr-old girl, who has season tickets to QSO, and takes scores along with her of the relevant works.

Girl: Oh, the QSO concert was terrible!  The conductor didn't have a clear beat at all, he was just [waves arms in a circular, egg-beater pattern]...
Me: Like a choral conductor?
Girl: There was just... no beat!  And he didn't bring in the strings, and because he had no beat they had no idea, only the cellos managed to come in in time.  [pause - then, a little apologetically]  I feel like such a hypocrite sometimes, being so critical of others when I can't play that well.
Me: But they're professionals, they're meant to get it right.
Girl [brightening]: Well, yeah.
Me: Have you thought about being a music critic?
Girl [gasping, wide-eyed with delight]: That's an actual job?!?!  That would be awesome!!! And perfect for me!

A Joke in Choir

11-yr-old girl, thrilled that the school is now BYOT (Bring Your Own Technology).

Girl: Oh, in choir this morning, Mrs S told a really funny joke!...
Me: Ooh, what was it?
Girl [pauses]: Um... [looks sheepish] I was ... uh... looking at ... something... on my iPad... and kinda ... didn't hear it.
Me: I.. see...
Girl: Well, it was about this girl, and she's singing something with so - la - mi and I think it's her mum who's wondering why she's singing about salami... You know, solami/salami...? 

I should ask Mrs S what the actual joke was.

Violins in Cellos

9-yr-old boy, uses a school violin.  The string department at school (including the instrument storage space) is housed in an area called the chalet (I'm not quite sure why).  This was while he was packing up.

Boy: I'm going to Sydney for the whole holidays.
Me: And are you taking your whole violin?
Boy: Nnnnoooo... Unless I have a smaller case.  Can I get a smaller case?
Me: You'd only be able to get a smaller case if you detached bits of your violin.  [Unfortunately, he looked enthusiastic with this prospect].  Which is the same as breaking your violin.  So, don't...
Boy [all packed up]: Oh... I'm going to put my violin in the cello now.
Me: In the ... chalet?
Boy: Yep. 
Me: Yeah, don't try to put it in the cello.  They... wouldn't like that.

[Cue giggles as he leaves the room, encountering a mate who had just finished his cello lesson].